- We had a thought that broadcasting of Gnome News was a little bit too one-sided and therefore we designed an alternative. Where we can present another side of how we may view the World and important events: Today we proudly present a brand new Broadcasting Channel – Gnomevision in cooperation with Nano-Surgeons International, World Association of Medical Suppliers and Televised Agression Media. I am Bluegnome Polite and I’ll be your News anchor, guiding you through the jungle of global nano-news. With me today in the studio I have Victor G. Anthrax, who has joined us after a long journey in the Taklamakan Desert, on the brink of Outer Mongolia. But now you’re back. What is your plans for the near future?
- Now I’m most certainly back! Be sure about that! To quote Richard Milhouse Nixon: "Let there be no doubt about it!"
- Now I’m most certainly back! Be sure about that! To quote Richard Milhouse Nixon: "Let there be no doubt about it!"
- Why have you decided to return now?
- It has come to my attention that this obscure diletant Professor Svinhufvud has tried to impose his imbecile Manifesto of Shortness upon decent people. I’ve returned to put an end to that kind of nonsense once and for all.
- I’m not sure what you mean… I thought the government was going to integrate the Manifesto into its ordinary day to day policy!
- Bah, over my dead and decomposed body. This Svinhufvud character, he has, as usual, got it all wrong. Short people should not accept their shortness and try to impose it on others. Quite the contrary – short people should try and become bigger and reach the same height andbody length as ordinary people. No one has ever succeeded in imposing their will upon someone bigger.
- But the resent events with those gnome combat groups defeating the whole PATALAP Force, wasn’t that proof of small creatures actually defeating taller ones?
- Sheer luck! Wouldn’t happen in a million years if you ask me. Very low probability! No smaller beings has to take growth hormones and undergo surgical alteration of their legs and arms. Look at China – there is a whole industry of body-lengthening there. Thousands of Chinese every year increase the length of their arms and legs. I wouldn’t be the least surprised if we have a World Champion Basket Ball Team in a couple of years or so… And that Svinhufvud character, he is not just a dwarf in appearance, he is also a midget inside his head. A small man thinking small thoughts! In fact, everything about the guy is smallish and insignificant!
- So there nothing in his claims for equal rights for shorter people?
- You have obviously not been listening to what he says and what is in that Manifesto of his! Its Animal Farm all over again, but now our societies will be ruled from gardens and woodlands instead, by beings that are not even registered as citizens. Sheer folly, if you ask me!
- And what do you suggest?
- We can’t accept somebody trying to impose their will and follies upon us, we must say no, we must resist and we must fight them vigorously! We will start with arguing against their follies, we will continue to resist the implementation of their foolish legislation and we will, finally fight them with all the physical strength we have!
- We thank Professor Anthrax for sharing his thoughts and recommendations with us and turn over to other news…
- I’m not sure what you mean… I thought the government was going to integrate the Manifesto into its ordinary day to day policy!
- Bah, over my dead and decomposed body. This Svinhufvud character, he has, as usual, got it all wrong. Short people should not accept their shortness and try to impose it on others. Quite the contrary – short people should try and become bigger and reach the same height andbody length as ordinary people. No one has ever succeeded in imposing their will upon someone bigger.
- But the resent events with those gnome combat groups defeating the whole PATALAP Force, wasn’t that proof of small creatures actually defeating taller ones?
- Sheer luck! Wouldn’t happen in a million years if you ask me. Very low probability! No smaller beings has to take growth hormones and undergo surgical alteration of their legs and arms. Look at China – there is a whole industry of body-lengthening there. Thousands of Chinese every year increase the length of their arms and legs. I wouldn’t be the least surprised if we have a World Champion Basket Ball Team in a couple of years or so… And that Svinhufvud character, he is not just a dwarf in appearance, he is also a midget inside his head. A small man thinking small thoughts! In fact, everything about the guy is smallish and insignificant!
- So there nothing in his claims for equal rights for shorter people?
- You have obviously not been listening to what he says and what is in that Manifesto of his! Its Animal Farm all over again, but now our societies will be ruled from gardens and woodlands instead, by beings that are not even registered as citizens. Sheer folly, if you ask me!
- And what do you suggest?
- We can’t accept somebody trying to impose their will and follies upon us, we must say no, we must resist and we must fight them vigorously! We will start with arguing against their follies, we will continue to resist the implementation of their foolish legislation and we will, finally fight them with all the physical strength we have!
- We thank Professor Anthrax for sharing his thoughts and recommendations with us and turn over to other news…
Inlägg
Inga kommentarer:
Skicka en kommentar